Tag Archives: hollywood

Tom Cruise as Jack Reacher? That’s a bit of a reach…

Posted by gruesomegreg on

When I first started seeing the trailers for this new Jack Reacher movie starring Tom Cruise, I thought the whole thing seemed rather silly.  Cruise hardly looks like the badass, tough-guy, judge-jury-and-executioner type portrayed in the previews.  As I remarked on Twitter at the time, Sly Stallone might be the same height, but at least he has the (steroid-enhanced) muscles.  Cruise, lest we forget, got his big break as a pretty-boy high-school pimp in Risky Business, and his biggest action role, Top Gun, was as a fighter pilot.  Hey, you can’t exactly stick Schwarzenegger in a cockpit…

Mind you, I wasn’t initially aware that the movie was based on a book, and that the character is the hero of a series of novels written by Lee Child.  On his website, the author seemingly suggests that Cruise isn’t right for the role, either.  It says here that Reacher is 6’5” and weighs between 220 and 250 pounds.  Even with Stallone’s workout regime and all kinds of trick camera angles, Hollywood would have a hard time making Maverick look the part.

Suffice to say, fans of the Child novels are none too happy with Cruise playing the protagonist.  The L.A. Times has compiled a host of angry comments from back in July, when they first covered the casting choice.  Some of these are pretty good.  Here are a few choice cuts:

“I can not believe they actually used an arrogant overexposed short IMBECILE to create such an awesome character. I will not see it and it literally RUINED the whole character for me. HOW COULD THEY DO THIS?”

“‘Tom Cruise? He’d be a perfect Jack Reacher!’ said no one ever…”

“I am so upset that they chose Tom to play this role. I will not pay money to see this movie, either. Get a real man to play that role and I will be the first in line to see that movie.”

Me, I think I’ll probably go see Django Unchained instead…

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Man, they couldn’t have pushed up the Canadian premiere of The Amazing Spider-Man by a day, could they?

Posted by gruesomegreg on

As an avid childhood reader of Marvel Comics, I’ve felt compelled to see pretty much all of these recent super-hero blockbusters Stan Lee has stamped over the past few years.  And while I kinda had a beef with The Avengers movie not sticking to the script of the original comic books, I hafta say, the Spider-Man series has been pretty good in that regard.  Of course, the origin story is well-known, but I recognized storylines from the first two films coming from issues of the comic book back in the day.  (Spider-Man 3, on the other hand…)  Not such whether Marvel had more input on these ones or if Sam Raimi was just a Spidey fan, but I thought they were well done.

Of course, the departure of director Raimi and lead actor Tobey Maguire for The Amazing Spider-Man has led to a whole refresh of the series with a new cast of characters (exit Kirsten Dunst as Mary-Jane, enter Emma Stone as Gwen Stacy) led by British actor Andrew Garfield.  While I’m not sure whether this one will capture the feel of the initial trilogy, I’d probably still go and see it–if only it was opening this weekend.  This being one of the biggest summer blockbusters, the studio has given the go-ahead for a July 3rd opening ahead of the big long weekend in the States.  But I guess the Canadian arm of Columbia Pictures has no pull, as its northern opening inconveniently comes after our national holiday weekend–and by one day, at that!

Of course, the day that Canada became a country was the 1st, not the 4th of July–although America has us beat by about 90 years.  And because the day itself falls on a Sunday this year, most Canadian workplaces (mine included) have Monday, July 2nd off.  Since the second is of no particular patriotic significance, it seems like a good time to catch a flick–it’s just too bad that the movie I most wanted to see opens a day late.  That said, part of me wants to watch Ted, the new Mark Wahlberg film, just to see if the twisted mind of Seth MacFarlane has directed a sex scene between Mila Kunis and a teddy bear.  (Hey, this sorta thing has happened before–albeit only in porn parodies, I suppose.)  I also kinda wanna see the new Oliver Stone movie Savages–but that one doesn’t even open till next Friday.

Mind you, I know where I’ll be spending my Day-After-Canada-Day.  The Bloor Cinema is offering a hoserrific double bill of Strange Brew and Fubar for freakin’ free(!!!) on Monday afternoon starting at 1 pm.  The second-best part is that it’s free–the best part being that it’s only a couple blocks away from my apartment…  Take Off, Eh!

Did John Travolta tell them “You’re the One that I Want?”

Posted by gruesomegreg on

As a pair of recent lawsuits would suggest, either John Travolta has a thing for male massage therapists—or there’s clearly a plot against him.  Reuters is reporting that the Saturday Night Fever star is alleged to have gotten down, gotten down with a pair of masseurs during two separate incidents in January according to a 2-million dollar lawsuit filed against him by the plaintiffs.

According to the lawsuit, Travolta allegedly sexually assaulted one man during a private massage at the Beverly Hills Hotel on Jan. 16, then, according to the other man, “rubbed his legs, touched his genitals and tried to initiate sex at a private appointment at the actor’s room inside an Atlanta hotel on Jan. 28.”  If the masseurs are to be believed, it seems Travolta didn’t know “private massage” is only code for sexual intercourse in Thailand and certain establishments in Chinatown.

Then again, they could just be making this whole story up.  It’s not like people haven’t tried to take advantage of celebrities in the past.  Remember Justin Bieber’s Babygate?  Yeah, that was a buncha BS.  As for Travolta, the alleged victims’ lawyer said “the men did not go to the police because they did not think the police would believe them.”

Now, if it had been Tom Cruise, maybe they would’ve had a case…

Contrary to King Diamond, it seems nuns DON’T have more fun…

Posted by gruesomegreg on

Y’know, I’ve always thought the Farrelly brothers’ remake of The Three Stooges would be pretty pointless, yet another example of Hollywood recycling itself.  Frankly, I couldn’t see how anyone could find this rehashed slapstick send-up offensive, aside from those who think that Sherlock Holmes should never have been turned into a Last Action Hero.  (Thanks a lot, Guy Ritchie!)

Turns out I was wrong.  It seems the Catholic League has taken offense at the film’s depiction of supermodel Kate Upton as a bikini-wearing nun.  They also don’t like the fact that Larry David plays a nun named after a notorious Nazi.  In fact, it seems that its president, Bill Donohue, isn’t a fan of modern-day cinema, either. “In the 1950s, Hollywood generally avoided crude fare and was respectful of religion. Today it specializes in crudity and trashes Christianity, especially Catholicism,” he said in a statement.  Hey, isn’t crudity a hors-d’oeuvre?

It could be worse, however, as a spokesman for the film studio points out. “And as far as the nun attire, I think we did the audience a favor by letting Kate Upton wear the nun-kini rather than (co-star) Larry David – it could have gone either way. We invite you to see the movie and decide for yourselves.”

Nah, I think I’ll pass…