Here Comes The Gambler… Murderer?

Since there haven’t been any new episodes of Storage Wars lately, the rumour mill is running on overdrive.  The latest?  Darrell Sheets, everybody’s favourite gambler, once shot a man in Reno, just to watch him die.  Well, maybe not, but according to Reality Weekly, the newest (and trashiest) supermarket tabloid, he’s been tied to a murder case.

Now, of course we all know to believe everything we read in the tabloids.  I mean, not only is Elvis still alive, but he was also abducted by aliens, haven’t you heard?  That said, you can only find out this and other important information by buying a copy of Reality WeeklyTheir website, which looks like it was designed by a 10 year old for 25 dollars, only offers two-paragraph previews of some of the biggest stories from its latest issue–and unfortunately, Darrell’s case didn’t make the cut.  If you want to find out more, you can apparently pick this rag up at WalMart “and other fine stores.”  Which fine stores?  Well, I called Indigo’s Eaton Centre location, and it’s not in their catalogue.  I’m guessing those fine stores would include The Monster Truck Accessory Center and Wifebeaters ‘R Us, however…  Not sure if Canadian WalMarts sell this either, but I intend to find out when I go on my next run for beer nuts and frozen pizza this weekend.

Mind you, I do have other sources of information at my disposal, such as the San Diego County police blotter, which I used to dig up this piece of information on Darrell’s home invasion a few months ago.  (Apparently that kid’s gone to jail for a couple years.)  Hmm, let’s see if they say anything about a murder in Vista…

Well, apparently a man was booked into the Vista Detention Facility a couple weeks back and charged with murder.  That said, unless Jeffrey Steven McCreary, 42, is one of Darrell’s drinking buddies, I fail to see the connection.  On the other hand, there’s a wanted bank robber in Santee who looks a lot like The Gambler, judging by these photos provided by the Sheriff’s office.  Not that I’m implying anything…

In any case, the cast of Storage Wars are well-known enough now that if one of them actually killed someone, it wouldn’t just be Reality Weekly reporting on it.  Thus, if Darrell’s connected to a killing in any way, it’s probably tentative at best.  So you can simmer down now, Ini Kamoze!

UPDATE 2/18: Sadly, I can now confirm that WalMart doesn’t sell Reality Weekly in Canada, as it was neither on the magazine rack nor at the checkout counter of the Dufferin Mall location.  (On the plus side, I did get a great deal on some frozen pizza!)  That said, I’m sticking with my original story: Darrell didn’t do it!

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