Slow news day on Parliament Hill? If you’re a political website like iPolitics.ca, you can always turn to a fool-proof (or perhaps I should say fool-baiting) method to get a scoop: take Rob Anders to lunch. The eight-term Calgary West representative, who I had the misfortune of calling my MP for eight years before I left Cowtown, is perhaps more recently known for dozing off in the House of Commons, but that’s not to say he isn’t able to run his mouth when given a platform for his ideas. After 15 years in office, the self-proclaimed “one of the more conservative members of Parliament who ever sat” was perhaps best known for being the lone member of the House to vote against making Nelson Mandela an honorary Canadian citizen back in 2001—and calling the former South African leader a communist and a terrorist in the process. Thus, if you’re looking to shatter your website’s record for single-day visits, a chat with Anders oughtta do the trick.
On that note, credit must go to iPolitics writer Laura Stone (and her editors) for not burying the lead. Though I doubt her conversation with Sleepy McDoofus began on the topic of Jack Layton, her piece published this morning certainly does. More specifically, Anders’ latest goofball theory is that Thomas Mulcair was the man who twisted the knife in Layton’s back. In one of the most astoundingly face-palming run-on sentences I’ve read in a while, he tells iPolitics, “It was very clear to me watching the two of those gentlemen in the front benches, that Jack Layton was ill and that Mr. Mulcair was making it quite obvious that if Jack wasn’t well enough to fight the campaign and fight the election that he should step aside, and that because of that, Mr. Layton put his life at risk to go into the national election, and fight it, and did obviously an amazing job considering his state of health, and that he did that partly because of the arm-twisting behind the scenes by Mulcair and then subsequently died.”
Suffice to say, this shot was heard around the world—or at least across the country. Even the National Post is succinctly suggesting that he (finally) be removed from caucus, with NP columnist Jonathan Kay being much more direct on Twitter, tweeting “Someone explain to me why Rob Anders is still, as of 9am today, still in the Conservative caucus. Canada’s Todd Akin.” Well, as I’ve said before on this blog, at least one former Calgary West Conservative happens to be of the opinion that Anders is in possession of photographs of Stephen Harper doin’ the nasty with a longhorn steer, or some other equally-incriminating evidence against Our Fearless Leader (who preceded Anders as Calgary West MP before he stepped away from politics for a country minute in ‘97). Otherwise, we can’t really explain why he’s still around either.