OK, I’ll admit, I didn’t watch the Republican National Convention last night.  As a Canadian, I don’t even hafta consider voting Republican, and besides there are much better things to watch on TV on Thursdays than repetitive political pandering.  (Like, Snooki & JWoww, like, totally!)  Thus, by the time I had heard about Clint Eastwood’s speech, it was already trending, and just about everybody in the media was calling it a major mistake–as well as the highlight of the night.  Naturally, I had to see it for myself, so here it is:

Now, the media had made it seem like he just rambled on forever, but it really didn’t seem that long.  Of course, when you get a standing ovation every second sentence, that tends to prolong things a little.  That said, Clint’s address was nothing if not disjointed.  It got off to a bizarre start, with him saying how he cried when Obama got elected, and then that he hadn’t cried that much since he heard there were 23 million unemployed Americans.  Erm, I’m assuming there are that many jobless Americans right now, not before Obama was elected?  But instead of pondering the logic of that statement, he gestured towards…

Wait for it…

THE CHAIR!

I gotta say, addressing an empty chair as if it was the President of the United States was pretty peculiar; insinuating that it was telling him and Mitt Romney to, as Pat Boone would put it, fornicate with themselves elsewhere just made him look like a crazy old man.  In case you were ever wondering why Eastwood’s characters never say too much in his movies, well, look no further than last night’s speech.  I gotta say though, it sure was entertaining seeing all those good ol’ boys rise in unison like a church choir, their old ladies with tears in their eyes.  Had he kicked the chair, it might’ve started a riot!

…

Speaking of the movies, Clint’s got a new film out in three weeks, Trouble with the Curve, in which he makes his first on-screen appearance since Walt Kowalski went down in a blaze of glory at the end of Gran Torino four years ago.  I swear I just started seeing ads for this flick on TV last nite.  Coincidence?  I think not!

In any case, Clint doesn’t get to play a geriatric Dirty Harry this time around, but rather an old, washed-up baseball scout who’s trying to make amends with his daughter.  Apparently, this movie also stars Amy Adams and Justin Timberlake.  Not your typical Eastwood acting fare, though I suppose it’s kind of a combination between GT and Million Dollar Baby, his last two films.  I gotta say, I liked him much better 20 years ago when he was trying to stop John Malkovich from assassinating the president rather than performing illogical, improvised character assassinations on the current POTUS himself, but hey, I might end up seeing this one in theatres.  I mean, it’s not like I’ll hafta worry about it conflicting with the Jays’ postseason schedule, or anything…