If you’re looking for love on EBay, well, you’ll no longer find Love Potion Number 9 come September, as the online retailer has added “advice; spells; curses; hexing; conjuring; magic; prayers; blessing services; magic potions and healing sessions” to its list of prohibited items, according to a recent update.  Their general FAQ states that “Transactions in these categories often result in issues between the buyer and seller that are difficult to resolve,” like when those magic beans couldn’t even make a mean chili, much less grow a giant beanstalk.  Now, to be fair, at least the person selling “3 Wishes from 1000 Year Old Ancient Genie” for $5.99 offers a 90-day money-back guarantee.  Mind you, I pity the foo who raised the bidding on the “POWERFUL MAGIC SPELL OF WEREWOLF TRANSFORMATION” to 20.50 GBP—roughly 33 dollars.  Way to waste your allowance, kid!

On the other hand, EBay doesn’t seem to prevent you from purchasing a Costa Rican nightclub (bidding starts at $375K), a zombified chicken nugget (sold for 50 bucks!) or this man’s entire life (although you’ll hafta email him to do so).  Not to mention the Melvins’ old, beat-up van, which the seller wouldn’t part with for just under 100-grand.  Here’s hoping he got a money-back guarantee on that advice…