Monthly Archives: September 2011

MOVIES THAT CHANGED MY LIFE: American Psycho (2000)

Posted by gruesomegreg on

I swear to Satan, this has nothing to do with John Baird’s business card.  I watched American Psycho for the 1,980th time last nite after an incident from the nite before reminded me that it had been weeks, if not months since my last viewing.  There was a girl (early 20s, blonde) in my apartment drinking one of those Tim Horton’s yogurt parfaits, and I noticed it left a ring on my Chinese mahogany table, since I had forgotten to give her a coaster.  I asked her if she was ready to throw it in the garbage, then got up to grab a paper towel and proceeded to vigorously wipe down the area.  (It’s a good thing I don’t have a nail gun in my apartment!)

Mary Harron’s film, which was largely shot in Toronto, is without a doubt the most hilarious horror movie ever made.  They actually show it on Showcase from time to time, due to its Canadian content, albeit never before midnite–though I do have it on DVD now.  I did eventually read the book by Bret Easton Ellis, and while just about every scene from the film is lifted directly from Ellis’ work, the book goes a lot further, and is in fact quite disturbing.  On the other hand, Christian Bale’s performance in his breakout role as Patrick Bateman is nothing short of a laugh riot!

This is perhaps one of the most quotable movies of all time (provided that your only clear, identifiable emotions are greed and disgust), and still plays its part in pop culture today.  A couple months ago, Scouting New York took a look back at all the real-life bars and restaurants mentioned in the film, many of which are still open.  That said, 150 Wooster now sells baby carriages and Tunnel plays host to fashion shows.  And while Dorsia was a figment of Ellis’ imagination, one of the guys from Godsmack apparently opened a real-life Dorsia in Chelsea sometime around 2008.  Alas, the place didn’t last long–and any reviews of the restaurant quickly gave way to an American Psycho quotefest.  (Apparently they just opened one in London, though.)

Alas, while I always found the movie entertaining, it wasn’t until I started working in the financial industry that I realized how much it mirrors my real life.  Much like Patrick Bateman, the most stressful part of my day is getting to work in the morning, and the most difficult decision I have to make is where to go for lunch.  On the other hand, you won’t find any dead hookers in my closet.

HOW IT CHANGED MY LIFE: Whenever I don’t feel like going out for drinks with colleagues after work, I either Just Say No!, or I tell them “No can do, got an 8:30 res at Dorsia–great sea urchin ceviche!”

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Scott Brison gets pissed on, erm, pissed off over 400 bucks worth of business cards!

Posted by gruesomegreg on

I never thought the time would come when I’d post about two Question Periods in the same day, but this new session on the Hill has just been so entertaining that I couldn’t hold back the urge to let loose with this stream of witty back-and-forth banter.  Alas, after the NDP used its secret weapon on Tony Clement yesterday, he was noticeably absent from today’s Q&A, and as such, the opposition turned to John Bateman Baird and his penchant for flashy business cards.  The charge was led by Liberal MP Scott Brison, whose business card likely looks like Luis Carruthers’, judging by his jealous tone.  Here are some highlights from their exchange, as reported by The Globe and Mail (with typos intact):

Mr. Brison began by pointing out that it is against Treasury Board rules to have gold on business cards because it’s too expensive. “Why is the minister breaking government rules?” asked Mr. Brison. “Why is he giving taxpayers the gold finger?”

Mr. Baird rose with a sly smirk on his face.

“When I arrived in the Parliament this morning, I was deeply disturbed that to realize that the president of the Treasury Board wasn’t here to take this question,” said Mr. Baird, prompting laughter on all sides of the House.

…

Then came the punch line. “When Canadian are struggling just to get by, why are Conservative ministers showering each other with gold?” Mr. Brison asked. “Why the golden showers, Mr. Speaker?”

…

After Question Period, Mr. Brison feigned ignorance of the meaning of golden shower.

“I’m a country guy. I don’t know how you interpret these kinds of things, but I’m not that sophisticated in that regard,” he told reporters. “But I certainly wouldn’t want to piss off the minister.”

I was going to close with a cute comment, but I don’t think I can top that one. ;)

COMMENT OF THE DAY: Just another day in La Loche, SK…

Posted by gruesomegreg on

From: http://www.winnipegfreepress.com/canada/breakingnews/rcmp-say-crowd-attacked-two-mounties-in-northwestern-saskatchewan–130869423.html

Well, I dunno where this Winnipeg Free Press poster comes from, but I’m not sure I wanna live there.

 

(Please tell me the RCMP has a La Loche police blotter online somewhere!)

 

UPDATE 4:40 PM: Although an alarming number of CBC commenters seem to be blaming the RCMP here, there are still a couple of gems to be found on Page 4.  This one gets honourable mention:

 

 

 

But I think we have a winner…

Man, Vancouver’s got nothing on La Loche, SK!

Posted by gruesomegreg on

Apparently, you don’t get between Saskatchewaners and their ATVs.  As CBC News reports, a wild party in the northern Sask. town of La Loche (population 2,300) came screeching to a halt early this morning when the RCMP showed up, causing a 29-year-old man to crash his off-roader into a ditch.  The man lost consciousness, and was taken to hospital, but the party didn’t stop there.  In a display that would bring a tear to the eye of any hockey rioter in Vancouver or Montreal, a crowd of 50 to 70 people pelted the cops and EMTs with bottles, cans and those cardboard hats made out of Pilsner boxes.  (I’m assuming that’s what the CBC means by “other debris.”)

The crowd followed the cops to the hospital, where they smashed windows, laid waste to the ambulance, and even set the cop car on fire!  Dayum.  Anybody up there with an iPhone, or a hand-held VHS camcorder get any footage of this?  I’d purchase that videotape from the back of some guy’s van in the parking lot behind the general store, no doot aboot it!

UPDATE 4:10 PM: And here’s a picture of the torched police truck, courtesy of CP.  Man, if the cops showed up in a 4×4, then perhaps robotic_stance (see post above) has a point!

China the Beautiful!?

Posted by gruesomegreg on

I’ve yet to see an English story on this, but Agence France-Presse is reporting that the Chinese government made a faux pas today by launching its Tiangong-1 space station to the tune of “America the Beautiful”—albeit without lyrics—on state-controlled CCTV.  Apparently, this isn’t the first time they’ve co-opted American patriotic imagery, either.  In January, a CCTV report on a Chinese aerial exercise featured clips from Top Gun.  (No word as to whether Tom Cruise was overdubbed in Cantonese or Mandarin.)

The AFP piece quotes a Chinese blogger, who wrote « A l’heure H j’étais en train de dîner dans un hôtel avec des étrangers travaillant pour une société américaine et des clients chinois, et nous regardions la diffusion en direct.  Tous les Chinois ont soudain eu envie de disparaître sous terre. »

(Translation: “At the time of the launch, I was having dinner in a hotel with some foreigners from an American company and their Chinese clients, and we were watching the live broadcast.  All of the Chinese had the sudden urge to disappear underground.”)

When all else fails, turn to Ruth Ellen Brosseau!

Posted by gruesomegreg on

Although Peter MacKay stole most of the headlines in yesterday’s Question Period, the opposition continued its attack on Tony Clement, who remains mum on the G8 slush fund.  With the NDP failing to get a rise out of the Treasury Board President, they went with an old party adage to attempt to draw comment from Clement: When all else fails, turn to Ruth Ellen Brosseau.

After two more direct challenges to Mr. Clement’s fortitude, the NDP sent up Ruth Ellen Brosseau, the member for Berthier-Maskinongé and the subject of countless jokes. ”As a single mother, my days are very full,” she said, standing straight and tall with her hands folded together in front of her. She proceeded to explain her commitments to home and family and work and her efforts to get home at a decent hour.

“The last thing I want is to hear about the mismanagement of public funds at the G8 summit,” she claimed. A minister who does not respond to questions and refuses to accept responsibility, is that really the model we want to pass on to our children?”

You go, girl!  Too bad John Baird didn’t give you much of an answer, though…

GUILTY PLEASURES: Quebec politics

Posted by gruesomegreg on

Who can forget the Maclean’s cover that came out almost a year ago today?  Suffice to say it was controversial, causing quite a storm in La Belle Province (I think this is my favourite photoshopped cover).  But hey, I gotta say, our Eastern neighbours’ political scandals are a lot more entertaining than Premier Dad and his Comfortable Majority.  (I heard the sequel comes out next Thursday, though it doesn’t have a title as of yet…)

The latest from Quebec is the Jacques Duchesneau story, in which the head of the province’s anticorruption unit is calling for a public inquiry into the illicit funding and undue political influence within the construction industry.  This shit makes for such great TV that he went on a popular French talk show to discuss his findings before he even spoke to the transport minister, much less the National Assembly!

Of course, this comes hot on the heels of the Loi 204 saga, which protects Quebecor (parent company of Sun Media, BTW) from any future legal action in the building and naming rights of a new hockey rink in Quebec City, with which PKP and company hope to attract a struggling NHL franchise.  This bill, put forward by the opposition Parti québecois, was so controversial that it caused a handful of its members to resign–one of which has gone on to start his own separatist sovereigntist party.  Did I mention that the man leading in the polls to become the next premier doesn’t have his own party yet?

Even when there isn’t some sorta scandal brewing, the day-to-day activities in the National Assembly are quite dramatic in their own right.  Last week, Liberal MNA Norman MacMillan called the third opposition party’s parliamentary leader a “grosse crisse” (it loses something in translation, trust me), which was picked up by his deskmate’s microphone as he was giving a speech.  Around the same time, a fight nearly broke out between David Whissell and Claude Pinard during a meeting of the agriculture committee.  Man, even First Among Equals didn’t have this kinda action!  (Mind you, I’ve only read the book…)  And I haven’t even mentioned Montreal and its complicated system of 103 city councillors, borough councillors and mayors, plural–we’ve got 44, and a million more people.  Suffice to say, Rob Ford would have field day with that gravy train!

Alas, as much as I find the political situation in Quebec entertaining, it certainly illustrates why I wouldn’t wanna live there–though if I did, I almost certainly would be voting for the Rhinoceros Party.  After all, they seem to be no less ridiculous than the ones currently running things in that province…

UPDATE 10:26 AM: Unbeknownst to me upon posting this last nite, two more Parti québécois riding association presidents have resigned, bringing the total to six since Bill 204 was presented in the National Assembly.  One of them, François Lemay, had some particularly harsh words for the party in his resignation letter:

«Je refuse de continuer à faire tous les sacrifices personnels inhérents à la vie militante si ce sont mes propres généraux qui, par leurs mauvaises décisions, m’envoient à l’abattoir.»

(Translation: I refuse to continue to make all the personal sacrifices inherent to the partisan life if it’s my own generals who, by their poor decisions, send me to the abattoir.”)

COMMENT OF THE DAY: The right weighs in on Dr. Palumbo…

Posted by gruesomegreg on

If you don’t know who Dr. Giovanni Palumbo is, read my post below this one.

From: http://arts.nationalpost.com/2011/09/29/accused-shania-twain-stalker-proclaims-desire-to-plead-guilty-in-courtroom-outburst/

 

From: http://www.torontosun.com/2011/09/29/obsessed-shania-fan-tries-to-plead-guilty

 

crazedPartisan, that nickname suits you to a T!

Calling Dr. Love: Shania Twain’s stalker is an Ottawa doctor!

Posted by gruesomegreg on

So, today the trial began of Dr. Giovanni (John) Palumbo, a 51-year-old general practitioner in the Ottawa area, accused of stalking Canadian country music “icon” Shania Twain.  Though she apparently has a thing for older men (just ask Mutt Lange), it seems that Palumbo couldn’t woo the 46-year-old singer with lines in love letters like:

“I was amazed by you since the first time I met you 15 years ago,” Twain read from the letter, adding that the statement made her feel uncomfortable.

“I love you more than anybody else in the world could love you,” the letter went on. “I will do anything and everything for you. I need you.”

Yeah, that’s a little creepy.  Apparently, the guy also drove his Lamborghini(!) up to her cottage in the Muskokas, and went to her brother-in-law’s garage to see if he could get any dirt on her.  Palumbo had already been arrested in ’09 for his strange behaviour, and was found in violation of the conditions of his parole when he showed up at the Juno Awards back in March, where Twain was on stage for something or other.  (Who watches the Junos, anyways?)

And here’s the kicker: he’s already unofficially plead guilty, interrupting Twain’s testimony by crying out “Eileen you can trust me. I am going to plead guilty.”  Apparently, that’s her real name, which leads me to propose an alternate form of punishment, being the progressive that I am: Six months in a well-lit room with Dexy’s Midnight Runners on repeat!

(Hey, it beats listening to Shania Twain!)

 

UPDATE 4:48 PM: CBC has revealed more details about Palumbo, namely that he also went past Twain’s cottage in a boat, attended her grandmother’s funeral, and sent flowers to her in Switzerland.  And then there’s this:

 

“Palumbo’s ex-wife, Christel Palumbo, told Postmedia News her ex-husband had created a “shrine” for Twain in his Ottawa home following their separation, and that she discovered 30 CDs filled with images of Twain, along with videotapes documenting Twain’s various televised appearances.”

Next thing you know, he’ll have burned all his Def Leppard records in effigy while dancing on a life-sized cardboard cutout of Mutt Lange…