This is another one of those afternoons where I’m gonna need two screens…

 …only this time, I won’t be watching basketball!  With a week to go until the Grey Cup, the Stamps are looking to punch their ticket to Vancouver with their fourth win over Edmonton this season.  The Esks will most likely have Mike Reilly back at QB, but he’ll probably be playing with a broken foot that hasn’t had time to heal properly–making him a sitting duck for the Stamps defence.  I can’t say I’ve looked into buying tickets for the Big Game yet, but I probably will soon. ;)  Calgary 43, Edmonton 20.

How in the wide, wide world of sports did the Arizona Cardinals get to be the best team in the NFL!?  OK, I don’t think anyone’s picking them to win the Super Bowl–even though it’ll be played at their stadium–but at 9-1, the Cards have the best record in the league this season, a couple games ahead of anyone else in the NFC.  The answer is they’ve been doing it with defense (note the American spelling).  Only the Detroit Lions have allowed fewer points than AZ this season, and no one else in the National Conference even comes close.  Is it any wonder that last week’s Lions-Cardinals game ended in a 14-6 win for the home team?

That said, the Cards are about to fall back towards the pack as they travel to the Hawks Nest this week.  It’ll take a lot more than two TDs to win in Seattle, where the home side rarely loses, especially with Russell Wilson behind center.  And considering that Arizona is without its starting QB, Carson “Bad Knees” Palmer, for the rest of the season, they’ll hafta rely on Drew Stanton against the league’s third-ranked pass defense.  Did I mention that they’ll almost certainly be without Larry Fitzgerald, or that their rushing attack is the league’s second-worst?  Coming off a tough loss in Kansas City, this should be a statement game for the Seahawks.  Seattle 38, Arizona 7.

Of course, the Seattle-Arizona game kicks off at 4:05 pm Eastern Time, while the Calgary-Edmonton game starts around 4:30.  My laptop is charging as I type this.  Cuz hey, if you think you can go to a sports bar to watch the CFL Western Final in Toronto…you don’t actually live here, do you? :P

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Who says there are no November shows in TO?

True, November tends to be a slow month for metal shows, as most bands tend not to tour in the winter–especially those of the “get in the van” variety.  And with the Leafs and Raptors double-booking the ACC, Hamilton almost seems to be a more happening place than Toronto this time of year…not that there are too many bands I’d go see who play the ACC, anyways.

By contrast, there often tends to be some pretty solid local bills this time of year, and this evening’s no exception.  Mind you, the headliner’s not quite from around here, and their attendance is contingent on them successfully crossing the frozen tundras of Buffalo on their way up from Rochester Rock City.  But dude, definitely don’t sleep on Blizaro.  They sound sorta like Paul Chain playing the Susperia soundtrack…and they ain’t even from Italy!

Support comes from Demontage, my favourite local black-metal band–which maybe isn’t saying much, but I did quite enjoy their most recent record.  We also get both kinds of power metal from the opening acts, with Valkyrie’s Cry playing the fast kind and Cromlech the slow kind.  I’ve only seen the latter in their very early days, but the stuff they’ve got posted online reminds me a lot of Atlantean Kodex, which is definitely a good thing.

All info is on the poster above, yo!

Much to my dismay, Guy Fieri’s salsa verde tastes nothing like hairspray…

002I love how the jar has 420 ml in it…

Picked this bad boy up at my local Metro.  While I wouldn’t normally pay, like, eight bucks for a jar of hot sauce, this isn’t your ordinary green salsa, no sir!  You’ve got the creaminess of the xanthan gum, a nice tang from the dextrose and yeast extract, and the “natural fire roast flavor,” which adds a nice kick.  This salsa is so “money” it’s green!  (It actually says that on the other side of the jar.)  And while I wouldn’t put it on a flip-flop, it’s still pretty bananas–and bananas is good!  Can you say “Winner Winner, Fridge Pizza Dinner?”

003

Let’s break it down, here.  You’ve got some mini pita bread, warmed up in the microwave, slathered in Guy’s special sauce, with a buncha Parmesan cheese dumped on top.  Shut the front door!  OK, so it ain’t no chicken base ‘n garlic salt…but this dish was still better than those cold pork tacos I had at Guy’s American Kitchen and Bar!

Zags are back, baby!

Remember how a coupla weeks back, I said I’d never been more excited for an NBA basketball season?  Well hey, the Raps are 9-2, tops in the East…aaaaaaand they even beat the league-leading Grizzlies last night.  But I gotta say, halfway through the first full week of college hoops, I’m even more excited for NCAA basketball right now.  In fact, I’ve never been this excited about my Gonzaga Bulldogs since, well, March of last year, when they finished the regular season atop the AP polls.  And yes, I even bought the t-shirt–more than one!

No need to talk about that year’s tourney; let’s just say I hate Wichita State more than Adam Morrison hates UCLA, and leave it at that.  But hey, this season’s Zags could be even better than either the Morrison or Kelly Olynyk-led squads–hell, none other than ESPN bracketologist Joe Lunardi, the Nate Silver of seeding teams, has them in his preseason Final Four.  Perhaps the fact that they utterly annihilated his alma matter last night had something to do with it?

Granted, it was a late tip on the East Coast, but I went to bed with Gonzaga leading St. Joe’s 48-10 at the half.  And the Hawks (no, not Seattle) wouldn’t even get 48 points the entire game, as the Zags handed them the worst loss in the entire history of their basketball program, 94-42.  Mind you, that St. Joe’s team lost a lotta key players since last year’s tournament appearance…but said soul-destroying defeat came just two days after GU dispatched 22-ranked SMU with relative ease, holding the top-25 school to just 56 points in the process.  Hell, the team that’s put up the highest score against Gonzaga so far was lowly Sacramento State.  They lost 104-58, BTW.

But we’re not just doing it on defence.  This team scores mad buckets, with the kind of post presence not seen since the Harris/Olynyk/Dower days.  Przemek “Polish Shaq” Karnowski, a 7’1″ freshman on that top-ranked team, has started to come into his own in his junior year–but so far, he’s been outshone by a current frosh, Lithuania’s Domantas “Son of” Sabonis.  (Perhaps you’ve heard of his dad?)  Add in the inside/outside threat of 6’10″ Kyle Wiltjer, who transferred from Kentucky to Gonzaga to become the next Olynyk, and you’ve got a three-headed monster that would eat Duncan, Robinson and Will Perdue for breakfast!  (OK fine, probably just Will Perdue.)

And that’s not to overlook the backcourt, anchored by four-year starters Gary Bell Jr. and Kevin “Captain Canada” Pangos.  Andrew Wiggins gets all the hype, but if you’re looking for the next Steve Nash, look no farther than Pangos.  The kid has lit it up since Day One, dropping 33 points and nine threes in just his second college game.  He’s also had a spot on the Cousy Award watch list his entire career, and now that he’s fully healthy, Pangos might actually win the thing–provided that Gonzaga goes deep in the tourney.

Hey, I know I went to Vegas to see the 2012-13 team, but this season, I’ve got Seattle on my mind.  No, I’m not talking about that game against Cal Poly…but rather the second/third rounds of the NCAAs, where the Zags should have the home-state court advantage, as long as they secure a top-four seed.  Right now, that doesn’t look to be an issue, but there’s still lotsa games left to play.  Personally, I’m practically shittin’ mah britches for their Dec. 6 tilt against second-ranked Arizona–a possible Final Four preview, perhaps?

Don’t even ask me what I’m doing the Saturday after next, cuz I’ll be watching college basketball!

(OK, so I might only need one screen that time…)

Episode 143 of Gruesome Tunes now available for download!

gruesometunesnew

CLICK HERE.

11/16/14 PLAYLIST

OCOAI – Somnium (The Electric Hand) 3:16

Grimpen Mire – The Hollow Wreck (Bastard of the Skies/Grimpen Mire split) 5:47

Oh How It Ended – Old Man Jenkins (Welcome to Brown Rock) 2:40

Indian – Rape (From All Purity) 7:48

Thinning the Herd – Oceans Rise (Oceans Rise) 4:17

Luder – Astrolabe (Adelphophagia) 5:34

 

1000Mods – Low (Vultures) 4:19

Anciients – Flood and Fire (Heart of Oak) 7:17

Sorrows Path – Clouds Inside Me (Doom Philosophy) 5:07

16 – Her Little “Accident” (Deep Cuts from Dark Clouds) 4:16

Drainland – Weakness (…And So Our Troubles Began) 5:33

Noothgrush – Stagnance (Live For Nothing) 4:52

 

Snail – Ritual (Terminus) 6:11

Coffinworm – A Death Sentence Called Life (IV.I.VIII) 6:27

Monster Magnet – Last Patrol (Last Patrol) 9:24

Royal Thunder – Shake and Shift (CVI) 9:14

 

Beneath Oblivion – Hope, the Deceiver (From Man to Dust) 9:24

Leaf Hound – Freelance Fiend (Growers of Mushroom) 3:12

Cardinal Wyrm – I am the Doorway (Black Hole Gods) 8:11

Bovine – Heroes are What (The Sun Never Sets on the British Empire) 4:35

Proselyte – End Regions (Our Vessel’s in Need) 3:50

Coach and Nick Miller pretending to be police sounded so awesome, I bought the DVD!

049Exhibit A

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: I am a huge fan of the FOX hit comedy New Girl.  And I feel the show’s writers have really stepped up their game in Season Four, sneaking all sorts of crazy scenarios past the prudes at News Corp.  OK, so they still can’t top that episode of The Mindy Project that was all about buttsex without ever mentioning it by name…but hey, Mindy Lahiri doesn’t have her own feature film; Coach and Nick Miller do.

Soooo, maybe it’s a little hard to disassociate Jake Johnson and Damon Wayans Jr. from their characters on TV.  They may have played other roles on both the big and small screens, but the pair is definitely best known for being Zooey Deschanel’s loftmates–especially Johnson, who couldn’t even have gotten arrested in Hollywood before he became known as Nick.

And sure enough, Johnson plays another loveable loser in Ryan O’Malley, an ex-college QB who suffered a career-ending injury jumping off the roof at a frat party…and now makes a living doing Herpes commercials.  Kinda sounds familiar, doesn’t it?

To his credit, Wayans is nothing like Coach here; more of an anti-Coach, really, an assistant at a video game company who’s too shy to even talk to the girl of his dreams.  (Say, wasn’t Coach terrible with women in the New Girl pilot?)  Of course, all that changes when they put on the uniforms, left over from one of Coach, erm, Justin Miller’s–yes, his last name is Miller!–failed game ideas.  Although they first use them just to score drugs and get girls, Nick, erm, Ryan takes things a little too far…and stumbles into a major gun-running ring in the process.  So, y’know, it’s kind of like a buddy-cop comedy, except they’re not real cops.

Suffice to say, if you’re a fan of the show, you’ll enjoy this movie.  If not, you probably went “Who the fuck are those guys!?” when you saw the ads on TV–and hey, unless you like buddy-cop comedies, it’s probably not for you. ;)

Because you’d look better in Grip of Delusion Radio…

Back when I was with CKLN, we always seemed to have our annual fundraising drive around this time of year, right when we moved our clocks back and celebrated Halloween…not necessarily at the same time.  One year, I raised a buncha cash with this show at El Mocambo, where we even got Sons of OTIS and Nadja to play.  I’m pretty sure all that money just went into some guy’s pocket, but hey, there’s a reason why CKLN isn’t a radio station anymore.  (Don’t even get me started on Indie 88.1!!!!)

In any case, I’ve since moved on to podcasting, where Grip of Delusion Radio has been the exclusive home of Gruesome Tunes (not counting this blog) since 2011–a little over three years to the day, in actual fact.  And even though we don’t have a transmitter on top of a building somewhere, the station still needs funds to stay afloat.  But rather than asking you to pledge 50 bucks for some shitty coffee mug, we’re selling t-shirts.  Cuz what could more metal than this t-shirt?

Not to mention that said shirts are just $15, which is such a metal price that it’s, like, $6.66 times two, plus a couple bucks or something.  Of course, that’s in U.S. currency, so just about 72 dollars Canadian these days.  Still waiting for our buck to bounce back so I can go back to the States…  But that’s besides the point.  Did I mention that we even have ladies sizes?

ORDER HERE

(Oh, and for the record, that’s not me in the picture.  It’s some guy named Gary.  He was also in the background of a few photos I took at EOTSG3.)